Tuesday, October 20, 2009

They say Hope Springs Eternal...

... but I may have found the bottom of that well.

I had my annual exam on the 2nd. You ladies know what that means.

Well there was an issue (yeah don't push there if you don't want me to fly off the table in pain) and they sent me in for a full pelvic ultrasound (like I haven't had a bazillion of these over the past 3 years with all the fertility treatments).

The results came back today.

Adenomyosis

Go look it up. I'll wait.

Worst case, it comes out kit and kaboodle. It is the only cure. I'm too young to hope menopause is around the corner and hormone treatment is basically birth control pills which is not something I'm willing to start taking again at my age because of the risks involved there.

Plus there are two fibroids, which if I have them removed will probably make the adenomyosis worse. But if I don't, they could block a possible implantation. Getting a little sick of being stuck between a rock and a hard place.

I'm tired of the almost constant pain (which is why I went back in). I'm tired in general of things being wrong with that body part.

My husband and I need to come to terms with the fact that the best course of action might be removal even if means giving up having biological children together.

I think I'm there as much as it hurts. I'm pretty sure he's not. I will hopefully get to speak with the doctor tomorrow about it.

Just so you know, the bottom of the hope spring is a pretty unhappy place.

8 comments:

Devyl Gyrl said...

**hugs tight**
I cannot imagine, sweetheart. I am so sorry.

Love you.

The Godfather said...

omg i'm sorry to hear this, you know how to find me if you need to talk at any time

Cylithria said...

**hugs** Sweetest lady, as you have often said to me, let's not give up all hope. I am holding you tightly in my heart . If I could fix this, I so, so would

BJ Blinston said...

we went through something similar. We had to give up the dream of biological children. Adoption is wonderful as long as it's right for you. It was for us and we have 5 beautiful children because of it. I hope that the ladder out of the well is an easier climb than the mess you've been wading through.

On a limb with Claudia said...

I'm very sorry to hear this! ((hug))

karin aka perpstu said...

*hugs* I'm so sorry. My heart hurts for you so much right now. Know that you are loved and you are not alone. If you need an ear to listen, just call.

Love you! xoxoxo

Toni said...

I'm sorry for your pain. I know this may sound flip, but it isn't meant that way - when you're at the bottom, the only place to go is up. I'll keep you in my prayers for the best possible outcome for you and your husband.

AlisonH said...

You didn't have enough to have to...! Oh honey. I'm sorry!