These are NOT Tears of Joy

The doctor told me this morning to consider the possibility that we will have to cancel the cycle this weekend.

I started out with 10 follicles at the first ultrasound.

Started the stims and only had 4 that were growing on the right by the second ultrasound.

Out of those four only two are large enough right now to be considered for retrieval.

But 2 isn't enough. It's actually pretty darn bad.

If the other two haven't gotten significantly bigger between this morning and tomorrow morning's ultrasound, we will probably cancel the cycle.

I just really want to scream really really loudly that IT'S JUST NOT FAIR!

Why won't whatever powers that be that control this let me have kids? I just don't understand. I'm not a bad person. Everyone says I'll be a great Mom. Hubby will be a wonderful father.

We cannot even get a frakking foster placement.

I'm not doing anything wrong. I'm following all the instructions. We aren't bad people.

WHY?!?!?!?!?!?!?