Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Not Sure How Much More

I can be expected to take.

1. They are putting little N's sister into a concurrent planning home this weekend.

2. They scheduled the transition meeting to map out how to move Little N into the same home for Monday, even though Slugbo clearly told the woman handling the scheduling that he cannot make it and I cannot make it.

3. So they are making decisions for Little N without any input from us. They are putting her little sister into a home where the mom speaks next to no English. This is great for the little sister, but little N doesn't know Spanish. Her sister is only two and will be easier to get her to switch to English, rather than force N to switch to Spanish.

4. They are going to trigger more nightmares about Mexico for little N by placing her in this home. I have nothing against the couple they are placing her with, I just believe they chose very poorly. They are looking at her last name rather then at HER.

5. State Adoptions shut us down completely today. They have told us to use the private agency we were referred to. They are citing budget constraints (stupid effing state government that doesn't know how to save money without screwing over programs that are needed). They are not moving forward with any couples that are not already in the home study process. They will be calling the private agency directly to let them know it is okay to work with us in this aspect (the supervisor at State Adoptions is married to the Foster Coordinator at the private agency - sigh). We start from square one.

We just want to help give a child(ren) a safe loving home.

This day needs to end.

7 comments:

On a limb with Claudia said...

I'm really sorry. I hope N and T find their way to a safe home. And I hope you have a chance to rage, grief, and recover from this circus.

BJ Blinston said...

Adoption can be as frustrating as it is fulfilling. I'm sorry that this has happened to you and hope that this frustration passes quickly so that you can get to the fulfilling part. I have 5 adopted children as well as a failed adoption so I feel for you.

~Just Jen~ said...

I'm sorry.

As unfortunate as it is, when you sign on to become a foster parent you have little to no say in what goes on in the childrens' lives. They are wards of the court and as such, the courts will do with them what they feel is in their best interest. In their eyes, you contracted to take care of N and now, she is your first priority. They simply schedule the meetings and tell you when and where to be; your schedule is of no importance to them.

Know that it DOES get easier. With each child that comes through your home you will become more accustomed to the ins and outs of the system and your frustration will wane.

Until then...we're here to listen

Reika said...

Circus, indeed! Working with the government (state OR federal) is often an exercise in frustration and futility.

I'm sorry to hear that such loving people are having so much difficulty getting a child into their home when there are soooooo many that are needy.

myboringblog said...

Hang in there. It'll all work out somehow.

Chicken Mama said...

I hear your pain and frustration. Little N has been a bright and shining smile in your life. You will always have her. You and Slugbo are very special people and all of the children that pass through your home will take a little piece of heaven with them.

Karin in AL said...

I am so sorry. Hang in there. You have given Little N several great weeks of love and peace that will stay with her. Remember we are pulling for you and here for you to rant and rave to.